About a year ago from now,
Winning the elections seemed like an achievement in itself to me.
What i expected was something so different from what i learnt, this past year.
Being president for a year, allowed me to see the ugly side of us humans up so close. judgemental, ungrateful, inadequate, disgusting, rude, negative, myopic, blind, unforgiving, unkind, dishonest, unreliable, unsupportive, hypocritical and much more.
Something we all are, but do not see in ourselves.
As leaders, we all start out hopeful, we all want the best for those we lead. But when the sheep do not allow the shepherd to lead, there is only so much the shepherd can do. Drag the sheep? How many? Will they be willing ? Happy? there is so much to consider, so much that cant be done.
I couldnt relate to many i was leading, why i ask myself. Is it really unchangable? If we go by the worlds way of leading there is no way we can relate,& we wouldnt be able to relate to them.
There was some time that i questioned my leadership, i questioned myself. & finally i realised why, i had this opportunity to be leader. i recalled a part of the book the shack, and a portion said that authority and position leading was what humans are now reduced to, and how it is the worst way to lead. I didnt understand, if no one is in charge, how will things get done?
Finally i understood. In such a relationship, no one will be happy, there will be conflict, strife, undiscontent, unhappiness. It was not meant to be that way.
I also had the chance to reflect on myself, seeing all the ugly of us humans in the past year allowed me the opportunity as if watching it as a show. It gave me time to look at the happenings and look at myself.
It makes me want to change. Not to ‘be better than them’ not the want to not reduce myself to the same level as those, but for simply the basic , my conscience. Something i realised, we have all lost as humans. Although i would really want to say to please God. But i’m so distant from him now. i hope to find Him, along this road.
I realise the reason for my election now. A year ago i never saw it. I saw all the wrong reasons. It was to learn what you cant if they dont get the experience,
lead by love. not position. not power. not authority. not superiority.
although i did not get to in dance club. I’m glad i got the chance to learn this life lesson. Even when i was far from Him. He was moulding me all the time.
I do not regret choosing to run for president, i’m glad God used my pride to show me so much, He showed me my ugly through others, and taught me such a precious lesson that i finally can see.
Thank you, Jesus.
